so operating on yourself turns out NOT to be a good idea

who knew?

as i left the doctor's office today, an image popped into my head of this one de-motivational poster that is captioned: "it may just be that your one purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others."

it looks like there may be an infection. also, it seems that the 2-day curriculum with the apple cider vinegar isn't to be "tweaked" into a 3-week treatment.

doctor can't tell anything right now because, as he said, "you messed harvey up bad." but he cauterized it, did some other stuff, and now i have to stay off it for a week with the possibility of surgery to follow.

i really do feel like that poster... the image was of a shipwreck.

harvey

so this is harvey. harvey is a cluster of warts on my heel. i am trying to kill harvey.

i have gone to a doctor that injected chemotherapy drugs into harvey. he didn't die, he multiplied.

i have frozen harvey with liquid nitrogen. again, harvey didn't die.

now, apple cider vinegar. i believe harvey could be dying this time. he's putting up a good fight, the firey needles of pain he shoots up my leg tells me he is NOT amused. harvey is stubborn, but i'm more stubborn. he thinks if he causes enough pain i'll give up. oh harvey, you foolish foolish mortal.

i've been at this for almost 3 weeks now. a weaker wart would have been dead and gone after two days. but not harvey. i believe harvey is part chuck norris, and we all know chuck norris doesn't die.

he probably wouldn't be sportin' a sponge bob bandaid either, but hey, that's how harvey rolls.

i'm blogging again and i may be dying

i've been cut off from facebook. the place i used to go to post this absurd snippets. so i'm blogging.

and, i could be dying. i could also be a lottery winner, though unlikely since i don't buy tickets. perhaps a sweepstakes winner is more feasible.

here's the story. i notice a voicemail on my phone today. it's a woman, addressing me as mizzzz holthouse. i need to redo something and come by as soon as possible.

the most reasonable explanation is that my one security clearance that hit a small hiccup last week (i need to quit joking around about turning to a life of crime) has hit another snag. i am guessing that whatever form i filled out TWO weeks ago had some kind of expiration date that has since expired while waiting for the aforementioned snag to be sorted out. which it has. been sorted out i mean. the expiration date thing is pure speculation.

BUT, the caller left no name, no phone number, did not mention her organization... just my name, i need to redo the unintelligible thing, please stop by asap.

now i'm waiting to see what the most reasonable suspect has to say. meanwhile, what if it's not them? what if my doctor has called to tell me something tragic? what if the DMV has finally admitted that my new license picture is indeed too heinous to be printed on my ID? what if whomever took over for ed mcmahon has 20 million dollars waiting for me?

it's been like 3 minutes now since i called and still no word. this is a debacle.

sept. 11

that was a terrifying day. i'll never forget walking out onto our patio and seeing the smoke from the pentagon. i left work around 11, put an 8 hour tape in my vcr, tuned to cnn and went to bed. that's how i deal with stress. took me a couple years to watch that tape...

wednesday morning i walked outside and all i smelled was smoke. it was sickening. it made it real.

i didn't lose anyone i knew, but i knew people that did. my friend and colleague, helen ginsberg at epa lost her cousin, my friend deb lost a friend in new york, the company we shared office space with had their NYC headquarters right next to the twin towers, my parents had friends that lost a nephew... that kind of thing.

years later i worked on a project for a world trade center insurance company and re-created plans for the restaurant, windows on the world. it was a spooky and poignant experience for me.

more directly i have been impacted by a good friend and two of my nephews going to war. i couldn't watch the news, i couldn't watch war movies... i prayed a lot and held my breath. they all came home safely and it was a big relief... every day i'm grateful our family never got that awful news.

in the last week i've watched a lot of specials on 9-11. specials highlighting the tragedy of lives lost as well as the heroism of ordinary people. i watched specials on the monument being built, the people involved in it. it's amazing what we're capable of... what we can give and how we can care for and nurture and comfort each other. it sort of makes me wonder why we don't do it every day, but i remind myself not to think that way, to look at what people DO do, rather than what we don't.

so many lives lost in this war with terrorism... that day 10 years ago, and and still now and we continue to fight to secure freedom for everyone.

i don't like to get dramatic about things, and maybe this is why i'm writing in my blog rather than going to any anniversary event... but i think probably on this terrible anniversary, we've all stopped to remember, to say a prayer for the families, for our service men and women and for our country. i think maybe we should do that every day.

inception

last week, when i realized i would be incurring no more business expenses for the month, i did my expense sheet EARLY. this is unheard of. not in 43 years has this been done.

i had all but one receipt, which i knew was in my car. so i set it aside, i'll get that other receipt tomorrow, turn it in, get reimbursed... ON TIME (also unheard of).

and every day... and i do mean EVERY day, i forgot that receipt. until today. oh joy oh hallelujah. it's only sept. 6, i might still get reimbursed on time... or, at the very least, avoid the usual threats i get.

meanwhile, back at the ranch, the weekend has been worked, presentations have been done, i've hosted many a visitor in my guest chair... the chair people refuse to accept as a work surface and continually move things from. yeah, that chair.

all the receipts i had been so mindful of... gone.

and you think that's the end of it? oh no that's not the end of it. it also appears that i paid for everything with cash this month. something i N E V E R do. but i checked my credit card statements, and my debit card statement and nothing is there. NOTHING. it's like last month didn't even happen. like maybe it was all a dream and all i really did was sit here like an automaton cranking out presentation after presentation. never leaving this cube or this chair. it's possible i have not showered, or changed clothes, or even eaten.

well, i think i ate.

Bye Bye Osama!

i've been watching the coverage of this all evening and a few things are getting on my nerves. first, every reporter seems to be itching to get some survivor or victim's family member to break down. it's annoying and rotten.

also, we buried him at sea, supposedly according to muslim tradition. i'm okay with that even though i understand how the families feel knowing their loved ones were slaughtered and got no such care. first of all, we are not THEM. i read somewhere that what sets a people apart is how we treat our dead. i'm happy he's dead. he was evil, he did evil things, he promoted hatred and he would have done more evil things had he lived. not only that, but it was justice... HOWEVER, what harm does it do to not desecrate his remains? he's already dead and we are not THEM. AND, do we really need the kind of grief we'd get if we mistreated his body? i couldn't care less if they don't believe we did it right, i believe our military acted honorably. and it cost us nothing to do so. we already got him.

i'm also irritated about the attempts to politicize this. on either side. the man responsible for 9/11 was caught and punished. i'm certain it was a result of the efforts of both the bush AND the obama administrations... but how about we say it was due to the efforts of americans, our brave military and intelligence personnel who never gave up. can't we just say that and all be americans together for one stinkin' day?

another thing that bothered me, though i understand it because i felt the elation myself... but the celebrating in the streets reminded me an awful lot of seeing THEM celebrate in their streets... in baghdad and other cities, celebrating the slaughter of thousands of american innocents. by no means do i fault anyone for being happy about this, but those images were so similar and it didn't sit well with me. i really don't think anyone's death should be celebrated like that, even someone so evil. i get it though, just didn't like it personally.

i'm glad he's gone, i hope his successor cannot live up to the amount of evil he promoted, though i'm afraid they've been well schooled. i pray with all my heart we never have to mourn the loss of even one more person at the hands of terrorists, though i'm not optimistic.

alright. i think i'm done ranting.

Happy 2011!!

hello from the nation's capital. it is wicked cold here and it makes me nostalgic for this hot july day:


recapping 2010. i started the year in denver for the wedding of Nene and Andrew Williams. It was a very nice way to kick off the year. i acquired 2 new nieces this year... actually, that sounds like i bought them. i didn't. they were born, the normal way. they are both just beautiful, though i have not yet met Addy. other than that, 2010 was pretty uneventful... though expensive... between the wedding, a new washer & dryer, a new car and replacing my dead tv, i feel like all i did was spend money... in large hunks.

okay... uneventful? in retrospect, i guess not... i began the year by celebrating my birthday... small gatherings with different friends every night straight for over a week. my boss kept wanting me to work late and then finally asked, is it over yet? it was awesome.

the spring was uneventful except for a quick trip home in april to pick up my new car which looks exactly like my old car but with more buttons. in may i missed the indy 500 for the first time in 13 years to attend my cousin doug's wedding in california. it was weird to miss indy but great to see the family out there and finally meet my cousins' kids. judi and jana each have 4 and i had only ever met bryce and derrick (the two oldest) when they were little babies.

in july i went home for a week, as i always do. karen and matt and eric were here for a long weekend before that. we stayed at danger house (tim and angel's) because i was housesitting for the month of july, so it was nice that everyone had beds and rooms. karen knocked her shin on the porch furniture and grabbed a nail on the rail to balance herself, then the morning they left, they locked themselves out of the house. thankfully i have sustained no further injuries at danger house. we mostly just hung out, but we did get in some duck pin bowling and i got a round of applause one night for the superb parallel parking job i did in front of the ice cream shop in old town.

also in july my nephew rick came home from his year long deployment in afghanistan. we are beyond thankful to have him home safe and sound and beyond impressed that ashley managed 3 under 3 while he was gone. she is truly super mom.

i stole these from ashley's facebook. hopefully i will be forgiven. :-)

super mom traveling from seattle to ohio.

WELCOME HOME RICK!!

The happily reunited family!

Evey (1), Rick, Ben (2), Ashley, Addy (4 mos.)

in september the girls got together at kalahari for a spa weekend to celebrate my mom's birthday. it was pretty awesome. i want to live there. in the spa.

in november walcher's burnt to the ground. a freak fire on a windy day. everyone is thankful that no one was hurt... and also for insurance. the boys will be busy this winter rebuilding in time for the 2011 season.

thanksgiving was nice as val's whole family was there. i had not yet met chad and becky's new baby, miss alayna grace so that was super fun. i got to know beth (mike's wife) better and she is pretty awesome, and i got to meet chase who will join our family in march (no, we did not scare him off, even after alex almost kicked his butt in monopoly).

my week at home for christmas was not exactly what i planned. my mom and i were both laid low by the flu. i spent 6 straight days in pajamas (win!) but i missed celebrating christmas with my family (fail). i saw mike & krissy & alex & anna the day i flew in, and then not again. i saw steve & randi briefly before getting sick, then not again until the night before i left. matt was home the whole time and managed not to get sick. that was disappointing. wait, not matt not getting sick, i was disappointed that i didn't see everyone more. on the bright side, if you're going to be sick, it's awesome to have your mom taking care of you.

2011 will bring yet another niece (rob & kaje have a bun in the oven!) and a new nephew, though he has already been born. he (the afore mentioned chase) will bust into the family in march when he marries michelle. what can i say? my family is awesome, people are clamoring to join. i don't blame them.

alrighty... that about does it for the 2010 recap. here's hoping everyone has a blessed, healthy, and happy 2011!!!