today my heart broke in half

i have an amazing niece... actually, i have a lot of amazing nieces... and nephews, but liz is special.

The amazingly wonderful and beautiful offspring of Ken and Robin Holthouse:  Ashley, Kate, Liz, Rob, Emily
Photo stolen (borrowed!) from Ashley

to me, liz is what you'd get if you managed to bottle pure joy.

liz has special needs due to a condition called hydrocephalus which went undiagnosed for 18 months until she started having seizures. liz is 18 now and today she had to present her senior project, a documentary she made with the help of her amazing parents and her extraordinary siblings, ashley, emily, rob and katie. some things i didn't know before i watched this.

Normal on the Outside

liz's seizures take things away from her, but not her joy, and certainly not the joy she gives me.

watching this video, i learned that liz has trouble making and keeping friends. i actually had the nerve to be shocked. i didn't know. i never suspected. and it makes her sad. OF COURSE IT MAKES HER SAD. i have reaped the rewards of having liz in my life and never really thought much about the parts of her life i don't see. and that just kills me.

liz's goal for this project... it's not just about her. she knows other kids are out there who have the same experiences she does. she wants to help them, make life better and happier for everyone. i spent the better part of my day sharing her video with everyone i know. i also watched it about 20 times. "getting it" more every time.

liz is a gift. a really big gift. she did an amazing job on her project. i was also struck by the eloquence and insight of her sisters, not to mention the production quality and skill of brother rob. when exactly did they all become such elegant and talented adults?

listening to liz speak about wishing people would invite her to do things, it made me sad. i feel like i've taken so much from liz and given so little back. i want liz to experience the joy she gives everyone else.

please watch her video. share her video.